This is by far the silliest and most inconsequential project I’ve ever done, and that’s saying something. I wanted to decorate my desk at my new(-ish) job, and the usual host of succulent planters and fidget toys just weren’t going to cut it - my new gig is far too cool for that. Also, I love architecture, and what would be a better monument to durable engineering than the Colisuem?

Side note: the Latin word for desk is mensa. But there’s also the Mensa organization, and I am definitely not a member. So the far goofier Deskus Maximus it shall be.

Design

As usual, I fired up OnShape, and imported a simple open-source model of a classical archway. After patching it up and simplifying it, I separated it into multiple parts for multicolor printing: the main structure in a matte sandstone, and the columns and arch stones in a fun speckled white “marble” filament. Then I created six variations of the arch, including tabs and slots so they’d fit together, and versions that mitered together in the corners. Well, to be specific, I didn’t create six actual versions of the arch - I just created one, and used dynamic suppression to parametrically modify it as needed. One of the best parts of these projects is learning cool new OnShape features.

I then designed brick-texture “walkways” that the arches fit into. For those, I found a brick-red filament with stone-like flecks in it.

Are You Not Entertained?

It’s not desk decor without electronics and optics. I used the Waveshare ESP32-S3 1.3inch Display Dev Board with an included 1-inch beamsplitter to create a “floating” image at each end of the second tier. That meant running wire through the lower tier to a USB-C connector in the back. I wrote a bit of code to display an animated flame while I’m at my desk. Coming soon: it turns into a flaming skull when a build breaks (it does have WiFi).

Touching Grass

I got to thinking about the desktop itself. Why are desks flat? So you can write on them. Well, I do exactly zero writing duting my workday, and I don’t even need a flat surface for a mouse, since I use a trackball. Not only are trackballs easier on your metacarpals and a delight to use, but they remind me of playing Missile Command. The point is, I don’t need a flat desk, so why not turn my desk into a lush, verdant lawn? Okay fine, lush verdant astroturf, but it beats fake birch veneer.

One fun side effect I didn’t anticipate: the miniature arch and field of grass combine into an optical illusion that make my desk look enormous. It feels like a brisk two-minute stroll to get from one end to the other now.